Friday, February 21, 2014

"Sorry I can't stay longer but I have to get home to my netflix"

My silence is finally over.
I am back to fill your news feed with nothing of real importance but I just became inspired to pick up my hypothetical pen and paper and write again.
You're welcome :)

But for reals, I came across Frans blog through Danielle at take heart who was featuring love stories on her blog leading up to valentines day and reading her love story inspired me to take another whack at this whole blog thing. 
Oh and no I'm not writing my love story, sorry if I misled you but I do not have a love story to write yet, unless you want to hear my fictional one I've concocted in my head where my future husband walks up to me while I am sitting and reading a book alone in a coffee shop and makes some kind of lame joke to make me laugh and then we immediately fall in love over our mutual obsession with books, coffee and zombies and ends with a theatrical proposal where he performs lets get married (the remix) by jagged edge in front of all my family and friends. 
Not that I've given it any thought. 
I also never daydream about him not caring what we name our kids and I get to name them all the crazy, off the wall names I want, all 10 of them.
Without further adu I give you :

The pros and cons of being single at almost 27 yrs old.
(Because this is a subject in which I am most knowledgeable)

- Shaving my legs. Ain't gotta do it.
- I don't have to worry about anyone else's schedule, I have a hard enough time keeping up with my own.
-I can decide to randomly sign up for a missions trip to another country without having to consider anyone else. 
- when you split costs of things with a group of friends and you are the only single one in the group they feel bad and sometimes don't make you pay your part. True story. 
- I don't have to share a bed with someone who farts. 
- I don't have to buy any valentines day or anniversary gifts, and for someone who is the worst gift giver ever, this is one of my favorite pros of being single.
- I don't have to know how to cook. 
- by the time I do get married I have enough friends who owe me for helping them with their weddings that I will basically have to do zero of the wedding planning myself. #winning

- when you are at a party or gathering you can't use your husband who is waiting at home as an excuse to leave early and apparently "Sorry I can't stay longer I have to get home to my netflix"  isn't a valid reason.
- sometimes being the 3rd, 5th,7th, or even the 9th wheel gets old. 
-you're grandma looks at you with her face as serious as a heart attack and says "do you just not want to be married?? Is that what's wrong?" And also expresses her sadness at the fact that she will be dead before she gets to meet her  great grandchildren. 
- your Facebook news feed basically only consists of engagements, weddings and babies now. 
-sometimes you have to sit by yourself at church and actually become grateful when the ushers make strangers scoot all the way down and sit next to you so you don't look super lame sitting in an entire row by yourself and making people around you wonder if you smell or something.
-you have to limit the amount of romantic movies you watch because they all make you cry. Even the crazy, never really gonna happen, un-realistic, outlandish ones.
-people assume since you are single that you have all the time in the world to do anything you want. Sorry but Angela and Hodgens are announcing that they are having a baby on the next episode of bones, so no I will not be able to attend your party.

Holler at me if you have more pros and cons, I'd love to hear them! (By hear I mean read, please don't call me, I hate talking on the phone) oooo another pro! I don't have to talk to someone on the phone everyday! Whoop, whoop!!


* Meant to post this before valentines day but forgot to publish it. Whoops. 

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